Every time I try to ask someone to explain it to me, I feel like they're teaching me another language. There's so much involved in it. Hayame-san yelled at me for cleaning my hands on my robe!
I wasn't going to just leave forever without finding you again.
[All of this had started because of her, to save her. He knew she had other friends, that was never going to be an issue. He'd always be there for her no matter what in whatever capacity he could be.]
It wouldn't be forever, Finn. I'd have gone back too, eventually. You know that.
[ And now she's feeling a fuzzy kind of ? ?? jealous ?? Because she understands that what finn says is true but there's also this new thing that she doesn't know how it's going to Change Things. ]
[ it's like a funhouse mirror, almost. safe isn't quite the word to apply to how she feels around ben. it's ... more complicated than that. it's certainty and understanding and clarity. unafraid, for sure. and not like everything else will be okay, but like they'll be okay — that's a kind of safety.
[ she has to reach. it's not her instinct to think of it in those terms, but there were ... moments. when ben had been drinking at the brewery, for instance. that had felt light. in the few moments they were unburdened by their pasts and their galaxy, it had felt that way. ]
[gonna sonic the hedgehog his way over to (undisclosed location). okay maybe he doesn't actually run because it's not as pressing as the time he ran to meet him because of rey drama, but he's still pretty quick about it.]
Hey. [gonna ... kiss him hello?? that's a thing he can do now??? wild. revolutionary.]
[look normally he would have, too. he's been low-key watching kylo fight with his horse for like half the trip and it's been great. it's like when your in-flight movie is the latest marvel bullshit and you're like a++ quality entertainment. BUT.]
I think — I've been thinking about what Rey was trying to say. About trying to get along with Kylo Ren. I know we had a truce, but it wasn't — I was just waiting for him to screw up. I think I wanna try giving him a real chance.
[if this was a tv show we would then cut to kylo ren trying to throw keith off the roof.]
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un: falcon
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[Peace proposals. Forest spirits. Political marriages. How do even?]
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[ though for her, she supposes, it's more than that. she tries to articulate it. finn will understand. ]
I feel like I barely even understand it as it applies to our own galaxy, let alone in Hanabira.
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It makes me wish we could ask General Organa what we should do. She'd know.
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[He had no idea.]
At least you've tried to get people to explain it. I just keep nodding and hoping I'll understand it someday.
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Nothing here is straightforward. Nothing.
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There's just a certain level of crazy that we were used to.
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You don't have to do everything.
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Have I told you enough how much I've missed you?
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I missed you too, Rey. More than you probably know.
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And I don't just mean the journey to Master Skywalker. When you were reassigned, I had no idea if I'd ever see you again here at all.
[ the part she leaves out is that she'd decided to stay anyway, for keith and urahara. ]
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I wasn't going to just leave forever without finding you again.
[All of this had started because of her, to save her. He knew she had other friends, that was never going to be an issue. He'd always be there for her no matter what in whatever capacity he could be.]
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[ And now she's feeling a fuzzy kind of ? ?? jealous ?? Because she understands that what finn says is true but there's also this new thing that she doesn't know how it's going to Change Things. ]
Poe told me that you two had news.
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He did? I should have made him let me tell you first.
[But he's glad they're talking about stuff? So that's good?]
I hope we're talking about the same thing.
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[ She's good at cutting to the quick. ]
I had a feeling it might happen.
[ Reasons she left the inn room with them ... ]
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[Thank the stars for that.]
Really? You never said anything about it. At least, I don't think so.
[Then again, he probably wasn't thinking about it in that context because he's an idiot.]
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But the way Poe is with you, it's different than the way you and I are, or me and Keith. So ...
I'm really happy for you, Finn.
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[So, like, none.]
I don't really know what I'm doing, but it's nice. But you're right, it's different.
Thanks, Rey. That means a lot to me. You'll help me, right? Not mess this up?
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But I'll listen. And I'll help as much as I can.
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Just like you know you can talk to me about anything, too.
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[ phew. though now that he opened that — ]
What does it feel like when you're with him?
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But a little nervous at the same time.
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the last bit pings her more directly. ]
Nervous about what?
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It's not a bad nervous. It's just this weird excitement, I'll kind of feel a little sick in my stomach, but in a good way.
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[ she has to reach. it's not her instinct to think of it in those terms, but there were ... moments. when ben had been drinking at the brewery, for instance. that had felt light. in the few moments they were unburdened by their pasts and their galaxy, it had felt that way. ]
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[This may be worrisome like he's figured something out, before the next message comes.]
Okay, good. I was worried I sounded crazy.
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uh oh.
uh—
phew. ]
Not to me. Never to me.
[ It's been a while apart, though, so she gets Finn feeling that way. ]
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You're the best, you know that?
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un: p.d.
hey finn! where are you?
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Why? You wanna meet up somewhere? Or did something happen?
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[acts like they have been apart for more than maybe like a whole morning/afternoon??? fuckin dramatic]
i can meet up with you, is that okay? just wait for me
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[You guys are gross.]
Sure. I'll just wait right here and you can tell me about your weird story.
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Hey. [gonna ... kiss him hello?? that's a thing he can do now??? wild. revolutionary.]
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Finn is awkward about it, but only because he's not used to this yet. Everything about all of this is new.
He likes it though.]
Hey.
[Herp Derp]
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it takes him a minute to just ... stop fucking staring at finn like a fool and remember what he was going to tell him.]
I helped Kylo Ren catch his horse.
[that wasn't what he was going to start with ... but those were in fact the words that came out of his mouth.]
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Spoilers, it's not Finn.
Or maybe it is because why would he ever think that opening like that would be a good idea?]
Why?
[Frankly, Finn would have liked to watch Kylo chase his own horse. That would be hilarious.]
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I think — I've been thinking about what Rey was trying to say. About trying to get along with Kylo Ren. I know we had a truce, but it wasn't — I was just waiting for him to screw up. I think I wanna try giving him a real chance.
[if this was a tv show we would then cut to kylo ren trying to throw keith off the roof.]